yet another trip

Sexy Englishman & I just got back from a week in London & Malta. I spent a lot of time wandering around London by myself, since SE had to work, & managed to only get lost a few times with the help of Google maps on my BlackBerry, a London map book & a Tube map. I have no sense of direction so it's pretty difficult navigating by myself. But after several days of doing it, I'm much better. We flew out Wednesday night, arriving early Thursday morning. SE went to work & I set off in search of Wagamama after a very long nap. I found the Kensington one after getting turned around a few times. My feeling of accomplishment quickly evaporated when I tried to get to Gaucho Grill (in Broadgate) to meet SE & some of his friends. He told me to take the Central Line from Bayswater to Liverpool St. Station. He should have said Lancaster Gate, & unfortunately I hadn't ever taken the Tube on my own at that point so I didn't know anything about it. After walking a long time in pretty but painful heels, I found Bayswater. When I told people where I was headed they directed me to the Circle Line, which also goes to Liverpool St. but is much slower. Are you confused yet? My BlackBerry had decided to stop recognizing the Vodaphone network, so I couldn't even get in touch with SE. One of his emails got through though, & he told me to hop in a cab. £20 ($40) later, I finally arrived. Fortunately, the steak was good, & SE's friends teased him until he apologized for giving me bad & un-detailed directions, so I cheered up.

Friday went better. I found a Ping Pong for dim sum & was fairly impressed. I spent the rest of the afternoon in the British Museum. I tried to go to the First Emperor Terracotta Soldier exhibit - supporting my peeps, you know - but it was sold out for the day & it cost £12 ($24) so I wasn't really sure I wanted to go. I had fun wandering around more thoroughly this time. I saw the other Egyptian rooms, the rest of the Asian rooms, the slavery photographs, Greek pottery, Assyrian jewelry, etc... that museum is ridiculously huge. This time I wore sensible sneakers but 3 hours of walking & learning all by myself was exhausting. Afterwards I sat in Hyde Park for a little while until I had to meet SE to go to the wedding in Malta.

We took the express train to Gatwick but couldn't find our flight. This turned out to be because it was at Heathrow, 40 miles away. With 1.5 hours to go, we managed to snag a cab for £81 ($162!!) & actually made it in 35 minutes. Despite some issues carrying on my violin & the tennis rackets, we got on board ok. Nerve-racking though. We had lunch with SE's parents Saturday before playing some lousy tennis. We both used to be pretty good but it's been a while. & serving is so much harder than it looks. We stopped after a very sweaty hour & I got ready super fast (for me) in an evening gown I first wore at age 18. Amazingly, it fits. Not sure how that can be - perhaps my dress follows its own laws of physics, as I'm still trying to lose the inches I gained in Africa.

SE's childhood friend was the groom, & the bride was Maltese. The Catholic ceremony at the church of St. Patrick in Sliema was beautiful. The standing wasn't great, nor the "lamb of God" stuff or the music but the bride & groom were obviously glowing with happiness & I love that part where they ask, "Do you take this woman, in sickness & in health," etc. I cried a bit. Plus now I know I definitely don't want to get married in a church & SE agrees completely. I just want to say that part of the rite. There was a lovely cream-colored Rolls Royce waiting for the newlyweds afterward, & we all trooped back to the hotel for the open bar portion of the night. I had way too many cocktails & glasses of champagne while trying to look sober for SE's parents. After they went upstairs SE & I tried out our new moves from ballroom dance class & got a little rambunctious - I ended up in the pool! We went to bed soon after that & couldn't drag ourselves out of bed until about 1:30 the next afternoon, & that was only because we had to leave for the airport around 2:45. We flew back to London without incident.

We'd stayed in the Queensway Hotel initially, but I wanted to switch so we booked the Rose Court for the second part of our London stay. Not good. We moved to the Edward Lear hotel on Seymour St. the next day, which was much better & whimsical besides. Lear was a nature illustrator & nonsense poet, most famous for "The Owl & the Pussycat." The whole place was being renovated & our room was absolutely charming. Everything was so cute & cozy I really wished I could stay longer just for that. Although it is much easier to delight in coziness when you just have 2 suitcases of stuff. The staff at the Lear are very friendly, it's in a great location (Marble Arch) & a double room with bathroom is under £100 even in the high season. It's a really good deal, I definitely recommend the place.

I'm impressed with the food in London. This time was very Indian-intensive - I ended up "having a curry" 4 days in a row. That just means eating Indian, not necessarily curry per se. Sunday night we went to La Porte des Indes. It's much bigger than it looks from outside. The cuisine is supposed to be French-influenced authentic from the Pondicherry region. We did the tasting menu & were blown away. It was almost as good as the Mughal Room in Cairo. The service was unobtrusive & excellent, while the space managed to be inviting despite its size, & I got an orchid sprig when we left. (They do that for all the ladies.) It was still alive when I flew home Wednesday; really wish I could've brought it home.

Monday I made a pilgrimage to Brick Lane after visiting the Old Spitalfields Market. At Famous Curry House I had an actual curry, which was quite small, so when I saw the 2007 Best Chef place Papadoms, I decided to try it too. Both were good; Papadoms was definitely better though. The chicken jalfrezi there was scrumptious. Later, when SE got home from work, we checked out Crazy Bear in Fitzrovia. It was a Thai fusion place recommended in some little guide I picked up in Heathrow. The drinks were fantastic & so was the food. It was a bit of an odd crowd in our section - I swear one couple was an oldish Thai escort & her long-term john - but we had a great time. The bathrooms alone are worth the trip. In fact, it's like being on a trip when you go inside. The room is hidden, first of all; you just push one of the wood panels in the hallway. Then you're inside a completely mirrored room. The only reason I found a stall was because those doors had knobs. The sink is a trough affair where you can reach across to the men's bathroom under the mirror. Very cool, though I bet a lot of inebriated customers get lost in there. Tuesday we had dinner with one of SE's friends at Bombay Palace in Westminster, which was also great. (Thanks to Google, now I know they have one here in NYC as well. Yay!) The boys got chicken murgh tikka, basically equivalent to tikka masala, & I got the chicken kohlapuri. Yummy yummy. So now after 2 very satisfying trips, I can confidently say that the restaurant scene in London is nothing for a New Yorker to sneeze at. The only drawback is the expense. Everything's pretty much the same price as here, except the price is in pounds so it's really double.

Since SE worked every weekday, I had to amuse myself a lot. I tried to avoid the department store Selfridges, because I have to be a bit sensible with money, but he insisted that it was really cool & I should look around. It was indeed really cool. I discovered my new favorite goth/domme jewelry brand, Chrome Hearts. I desperately wanted to buy something, but there were no price tags on the jewelry. So I astutely inferred from a tank top price tag of £100 that everything would be out of my reach. It's ok. One day. I wandered on, into the contemporary area, where I was waylaid by the prettiest dress ever. It was cream silk with black lace & embroidery flowers - I had to buy it. It was £90 ($180), not too bad. I got vinyl round-toed pumps for £40 & sexy buckled black leather gloves for £22. At which point I realized I had better leave before my wallet took another hit. The Old Spitalfields area was not very interesting since it's basically just a lot of semi-expensive yuppie shops now, but some of the restaurants looked cool. There was one store, Fairy Goth Mother, which had amazing corsets & goth/fetish-y clothes. I ended up buying a very pretty skirt there for only £20.

Tuesday was sightseeing instead of shopping. I started with the London Eye, which is quite expensive (£15) but a breathtaking view of a beautiful city. I always forget how much bigger London is than NYC. A nice English couple on the ride answered all my "What's that building?" questions - I think my favorite was Charing Cross Station. Afterward I made my way to the Sherlock Holmes Museum. Definitely not worth the £6. It's not even interesting to see Baker St., since it doesn't look Victorian anymore at all. The top floor of 221B was an extremely creepy wax museum of scenes from the stories. They were bad, but lifelike enough to make me reluctant to put more than my head close to any of them. My next stop, the Dickens Museum, was much better. It's in one of his actual houses at 48 Doughty St., & has a lot of paintings of him or people in his life, as well as some manuscripts, first editions & other Dickensiana. I loved his books as a child & I rediscovered how much fun his books are with Martin Chuzzlewit recently. Sure, the happy endings are always a bit too neat, but the journey there is always a great ride & it's so nice when things finally work out.

I really like London. SE has said several times that he'd like to live there part of the time in the future, & I think I'd be on board with that. They have got to sort out airport security though, that is a real pain in the ass. I hope in a few years planes will be flying faster as well. My flight turned out to be 7.5 hours of screaming &/or chair kicking from the little brat behind me. I love kids, but damn. I restrained from doing more than turning around to glare at her useless mother periodically. I figured if we started talking about it I'd get more pissed & the kid would get upset, which would be counterproductive. Anyhow, as much as I like London, it's good to be home.

please do not spit on the subway

It sounds crazy but it happened today on the 6 train - a guy & a girl got into some kind of dispute, which I noticed when it escalated to yelling. We were at a stop during the whole argument when the guy, already outside the doors, made fun of her do-rag or something. So she stuck her face through the doors & spit at him. He tried to charge back in & continue the argument but it seemed like people blocked him. She cackled, "Haha you wish!" & spit at him again. Fortunately the doors closed & we got moving again before anything else happened. People are crazy.

yucky subway perv

Yesterday it was super packed on the train. This tall guy put his hand on my back to steady me when the train lurched, which was weird. & then as we were all squished up together, he positioned himself so as to maximize his frontal contact with my ass. I kept shifting around trying to get away from the possible bulge in his jeans. No dice, he shifted right along with me. He was basically spooning me upright for at least 5 minutes (we were on the express train). There were a few layers in between us so I'm not sure if he was actually hard, but I was trying my utmost not to find out. I think he was even attempting to talk to me. At the next stop I moved to the opposite door & he followed me! & again put his hand squarely on my back to catch me when the train swerved. Thank goodness enough people had gotten off that he had no excuse to press himself against my poor ass.

don't squish me!!

On the train this morning I was sitting quietly, trying to read & not fall asleep (but failing) as I do every day, when a very fat man came towards me. When he turned around to sit down he was so big I thought he would sit on me! Fortunately he had good aim & sat in the next seat. A few seconds later another large male, species Sumo, plopped into the seat next to me. I was a comatose sardine for the next 15 minutes.

deplorable children

I was walking out of the subway today trying to find the bookmark in my book when this schoolgirl almost walked right into me. I was visibly startled & said "Oh sorry!" but instead of apologizing or at least saying excuse me, she & her teenage friends laughed loudly. They kept laughing as they walked down the stairs, saying "Haha we scared her!" Nasty little brats. Reminds me of the time I was on an extremely crowded subway car & this teenager in school uniform bulled her way on while a bunch of people were trying to get off. Even her friends knew better than to try to get on then. She intentionally shoved me & several others in the process so I bumped her harder back & she yelled something at me but I was already at the turnstiles. It's no wonder New Yorkers have a reputation for rudeness. If the kids are this bad now, they'll only be 10 times worse when they grow up. Who the hell laughs & insults when they walk into someone? & I notice it's always the schoolgirls traveling in packs, though one would expect the boys to be more aggressive. Maybe the girls are trying to be tough & show off for their friends, but they are old enough to know better.

Snakes on a train

This morning I was standing on the train reading when I heard what sounded like loud hissing, until I figured out it was a lot of s sounds with the rest of the words barely subvocalized. I looked around but no one's lips were moving. Finally I saw that it was the guy sitting in front of me reading to himself. I stared at him in disbelief for a while, because it was so goddamn loud & really seemed like it was coming from a giant snake 3 feet to my left in the middle of the train. Maybe he was an amateur ventriloquist. It was so disturbing, everyone would glare at him, look away in disgust, & look again as it continued relentlessly. Some of us even made eye contact over the strangeness of the situation. At the next stop, a seat opened up next to him. I had a lot of stuff so I sat down. After another 3 minutes of this crap, I tapped his shoulder & said, as nicely as possible, "Could you please read silently to yourself? Thanks." He nodded very fast, all twitchy & weird, but was much quieter for the rest of the ride. Before I became a dominatrix, I would never have had the guts to say something, & maybe it sounds a little bitchy, but it was absolutely intolerable. Especially at 7am.

Oddly enough, the same sort of thing happened on the PATH train. I sat quietly minding my own business, & this guy stood in front of me hissing. I don't know if maybe he was trying to get my attention. He seemed a little slow, so I didn't say anything. It was so bizarre. He stood there for 20 minutes going, "Ssss ssss..." I would almost rather have been traveling with lethal snakes, all this nonsense was so annoying.