don't squish me!!

On the train this morning I was sitting quietly, trying to read & not fall asleep (but failing) as I do every day, when a very fat man came towards me. When he turned around to sit down he was so big I thought he would sit on me! Fortunately he had good aim & sat in the next seat. A few seconds later another large male, species Sumo, plopped into the seat next to me. I was a comatose sardine for the next 15 minutes.