Sharapova sighting!!!

I forgot to mention that we were in the Meatpacking District & saw Maria Sharapova last night in her SUV! I yelled "Congratulations!" as we walked by, then one of the girls tried to go talk to her but her security wouldn't allow it. That game was awesome - she seemed to be struggling a little at first, but then she whipped Justine Henin-Hardenne's cute little Belgian ass. H-H looked like she was ready to cry when she lost... her husband looked really mad too. Kind of unsportsmanlike, I thought. Anyway I was so happy Sharapova won I almost cried at the end. Maybe I identify with a young one winning. Go Maria!

exhausted...

I was out until about 5 last night with Irish Ex & his friend & then I took a class at Equinox today with my friend the Dancer. Irish Ex wanted to fix me up with this guy & I liked him a lot - we went to Cute Lawyer friend's party, then we hung out at Salon & I danced my ass off. Met some hotties there which was really fun. Today's class was tough but not impossible like the other one, so I didn't feel like such a clumsy dodo. I love dancing by myself & doing my own thing, & it's hard to let go of my self-consciousness & embarrassment about being so slow to learn choreography. It's really cool when I can do it though. I also know that I might be uncoordinated & stupid-looking now, but I'll get the hang of it & I'll be a much better dancer soon. Now I've got 2 hours of practicing ahead of me - just wanted to say hi today for the 5 people who actually read this thing. :)

City Opera's La Bohème

Irish Ex-Boyfriend had an extra ticket to the performance tonight. It was amazing! Mimi had a little trouble with her very high notes (flat) but overall it was incredible. The arias sent chills down my spine. I don't know why we never hear about the City Opera as much as the Met since they are this excellent. The set was really cool too; they often just moved things on & off stage during the action, instead of taking a break. For instance the garret of the 1st Act glided off as Rodolfo & Mimi sang their duet in the snow, & a huge Momus sign came down as tables & such glided on behind them. They even had a train for Act III! It wasn't real or metal, of course, but it looked completely convincing. There are still a few performances left, I think, so go see it.

a fun story

This happened about 2 years ago & my friend Future Lawyer just reminded me of it. One night I was out with Hollywood Boyfriend (now an amicable ex) at Penthouse. We had a very nice dinner at the steakhouse upstairs, which I highly recommend, & his buddy was dating one of the strippers so after we finished eating the girls came over & made us feel very welcome. One of them, this tiny thing, boasted that she could drink Jaeger all night & never get drunk. Somehow it turned into challenging me to 10 shots in a row. Now, I used to be able to drink like a Russian bear, so I looked at little miss twig & said, "You're on." The waitress came & set down 10 large glasses in front of each of us - I'm talking glasses the size most bars serve cocktails in. I think we only did 2 giant shots each & then we might have started making out, or maybe someone offered me a lapdance on the main floor... I remember fooling around with the strippers down there & then I woke up the next morning in HB's hotel room with the Babeland sex toys we'd bought the night before strewn around us on the bed. & the vibrator was broken. Mmmmm... that was a great night. :)

S&M shoes

Check out this HSBC ad - it cracked me up when I saw it in the airport, because the shoe looks exactly like a pair of my domme shoes. They're 5 1/2 inches of leather-covered spikes. (The other thing is a chili pepper.) I tried unsuccessfully to find the actual ad online so I could put the pix together & make a poster or something. Perhaps a logo for my Mistress business cards...

my crazy night/day

So my trainer is very cool & cute. Can't figure out if he's gay or straight though. He worked my ass off today - we did weights & my arms pretty much gave out at the end. & then I swam 50 laps like yesterday. I'm actually shaking right now. That might also be the aftereffects of partying until 8am though... I can't believe I got up at 12:30 & practiced violin before exercising for 2 hours. I was out party-hopping with my friend Fashionista & we ended up at someone's apartment & talked for hours. Also, when we were at Gramercy Park Hotel I met Seth Green, who is super nice & friendly. I told him I loved Robot Chicken, especially when they kill people. He was really happy because he says they work very hard on that show, & promised to continue the slaughter. It's great when celebrities are down-to-earth & nice. Oh & he was a pool shark, which is hot. Now I'm going to drink a ton of water before I dry up from sweating out all last night's poisons.

exercise bunny

Yesterday I worked out 3 times - a dance class at Equinox (very fast & difficult), swimming, then a class at my old gym - & today I'm meeting my new trainer & swimming afterwards. I'm doing this all month. If I don't have a totally hot body by the end of the month I will just have to give up!

the joy of Equinox

Today I finally joined Equinox. I am too exhausted from the Urban Rebounding class I just finished, so I'll just say, Wow. It's a gorgeous club & I feel more refined just being there. The employees are super nice & I can't wait to start with my trainer, especially considering the horrifying amount of money I spent for him. I'm going to use this break from work to totally get in shape. I will attempt not to complain too much, since I did ask him to kick my ass. Off I go to collapse.

A good date

Last night I went out with Handsome Young Guy. We've kinda gone out twice - for drinks & parties. I wondered what he'd be like on a real date & I wanted to see if it would be more than "let's grab a drink." We had cocktails, then sushi at Nobu Next Door (very promising). I left my hair clip at the first place & he was such a sweetheart, he went & got it for me. I didn't even have to tell him my feet hurt.

He was hilarious & I had such a great time. I haven't had so much fun with anybody since I left the Ex-Boyfriend. I haven't let anyone kiss me either but I guess I really like HYG because we made out like a couple of teenagers. I'm smiling now just thinking about it. It's funny how sex can cloud one's judgment though... we haven't had sex, not even close, but I'm liking him more & more now & I think a big part of that is the whole fooling-around-all-night thing. It's hard to be objective when I keep daydreaming about him.

It was so nice to hang out with a guy again & not feel really weird & awkward because I'm so scared of men right now. Usually I want to keep them at arm's length - "No! Don't touch! Stay back over there!" - & it was such a relief to have some human contact, literally. Of course the Girlfriend & I play, but guys are different.

Well, it's about time to get on the plane. I hope there are no snakes. I'm in no condition to deal with any more problems, all speedy & over-tired & sniffly as I am. Bon voyage to me...

The airport sucks

I'm sitting here, ridiculously early for my flight, trying to calm down my allergies. I spent an hour and a half wedged into a little seat on a van struggling with my nose, & as soon as I walked into the airport it went into hyperdrive. I've now taken a Claritin, an Allegra, & 3 Dayquil. I'm so speedy from all the decongestants, I'm shaking as I type this & can barely talk.

Security is crazy. They are still not allowing any liquids except baby formula, medication, & contact solution. To avoid the madness of check-in I did all carryons but that means I have NO toiletries with me. It's a good thing my family will have stuff. This whole lockdown on items is retarded. They're focusing on the symptoms instead of the problem.

Anyway, I have to go scrounge up some Kleenex. Gah I wish I could reason with my nose. Maybe slap some sense into it.

Vacation

Today is my last day at work!! I told them I might come back in a couple weeks but I hope to get a Manhattan job instead. I am so looking forward to being pampered by my family for the long weekend & coming home to lots & lots of free time. I'll be able to practice, cook, exercise, read, all that great stuff... & of course, do a ton more sessions. My schedule's been so limited that I've only had one session this month! My whips need a workout. :)

Tales from the Dating Crypt

I've gone out with a good number of guys, & quite a few of them have been weird. Like this recent one. We met at a party, & he emailed me maybe a month later (!) to say hi. He also said something odd: "So I am wanting to learn more about the diva in you." ??? He's American, so it's not like he doesn't speak English well. I thought that was a bad sign, but I gave him a chance anyway. We met up for drinks on a Friday afternoon. He seemed nice & we got along pretty well. After I left, he texted that he'd wanted to kiss me. The way he said it was kinda strange but I shrugged it off again.

After a few more emails, he started flirting with me to the point where I was uncomfortable - it was just too much for people who had hung out only once. I wasn't even sure that had been a date until he said the stuff about the kiss. He started angling for punishment & requesting dirty notes, which escalated into demands for pictures of me in dominatrix gear. Then he texted me about "hooking up," which is a phrase I HATE even if we are actually having sex, & I asked him not to, & he continued using it in quotes as though he thought it was funny even though I disabused him of that notion. I stopped talking to him when he said, "either meet me this week in your dom outfit for a drink or email me a naked pic :-)" Man, guys can be freaks.

bitch

The other night on St. Mark's Place, a beggar asked me for change. I was window-shopping so I actually turned around, thinking it was someone with a legitimate question, instead of ignoring him as I normally do. I said we didn't have any change. As he walked away my friend heard him say, "Bitch." She stopped him & asked, "Why do you have to talk to my friend like that? It's so disrespectful." He pretended not to have said anything. She asked him again, so he said loudly over her further questions, "No I didn't say that, I was speaking French. Yeah I was speaking French, I was speaking French" as he walked away. It was such a bizarre reason we just let it go. I think that's the first time I've ever been called a bitch here. A quintessential Manhattan experience. Actually, sometimes I like to call myself a grade-A New York bitch so it's kind of funny.

brrrr

The giant corporation where I work at the moment is freezing cold. My fingers are so frozen I'm typing at half speed. I have no idea why they blast the AC this way - perhaps they think we're penguins & miss the Antarctic tundra. It's really not that hot outside either, certainly not today (pouring rain). I bet they could supply power to Queens & keep this place at a bearable temperature on the exact same amount of energy they're using to turn our extremities blue. Well, fortunately I get to leave in an hour.

Jonathan Franzen book-slapped

Today in the Times, Michiko Kakutani published a scathing review of Jonathan Franzen's new memoir. I didn't read The Corrections because I thought it'd be awful, so I can't comment on him as a writer, but it was so much fun to watch him get smacked around in print. He seems like a giant asshole from what I've heard, anyway. Vilifying someone in well-written prose is an art we should definitely bring back.

Donald Trump's blog

Seriously? The Donald has a blog & Page Six reads it? I think I hear the hoofbeats of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

meat... mmmmm...

The Girlfriend & I, carnivores that we are, returned to Yakiniku last night. What can I say, it was Short Rib madness night! (Actually, I believe the restaurant calls it "Let's Eat Short Rib on Monday.") It was even better this time because we paid half as much. There's just something wonderful about meat... I could never give it up. Also it's really fun to grill it ourselves. We're both a little pyro.

Crosswalk zombies

This morning as I walked to the train, I noticed that everyone kind of looked like lurching zombies when they tried to cross the street on a red light. I think it's because at that hour there are fewer cars, so we kind of creep forward one lane at a time. It reminded me very much of a scene from Shaun of the Dead when the zombies are shambling towards Shaun & his friends. Except, of course, we were shambling to a coffee cart & not making that weird moaning sound.

dark matter revisited

More info on dark matter...

Snakes on a train

This morning I was standing on the train reading when I heard what sounded like loud hissing, until I figured out it was a lot of s sounds with the rest of the words barely subvocalized. I looked around but no one's lips were moving. Finally I saw that it was the guy sitting in front of me reading to himself. I stared at him in disbelief for a while, because it was so goddamn loud & really seemed like it was coming from a giant snake 3 feet to my left in the middle of the train. Maybe he was an amateur ventriloquist. It was so disturbing, everyone would glare at him, look away in disgust, & look again as it continued relentlessly. Some of us even made eye contact over the strangeness of the situation. At the next stop, a seat opened up next to him. I had a lot of stuff so I sat down. After another 3 minutes of this crap, I tapped his shoulder & said, as nicely as possible, "Could you please read silently to yourself? Thanks." He nodded very fast, all twitchy & weird, but was much quieter for the rest of the ride. Before I became a dominatrix, I would never have had the guts to say something, & maybe it sounds a little bitchy, but it was absolutely intolerable. Especially at 7am.

Oddly enough, the same sort of thing happened on the PATH train. I sat quietly minding my own business, & this guy stood in front of me hissing. I don't know if maybe he was trying to get my attention. He seemed a little slow, so I didn't say anything. It was so bizarre. He stood there for 20 minutes going, "Ssss ssss..." I would almost rather have been traveling with lethal snakes, all this nonsense was so annoying.